The joke’s on you: Information security jokes we can all appreciate

Everyone appreciates a cracker joke every now and then. Since it’s Christmas, we thought we would do something fun and share some of the favourite information security jokes from the office.

There was a catastrophic cyber attack recently…
The government is still looking for the hacker. They think he ran some ware.

What does a pirate store his data on?
An Arrrrr Drive

I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarves

IPV6 walks into a bar.
No one talks to it.

Had a band named 1023MB… never made a gig.

Q. What is the biggest lie in the entire universe?
A. “I have read and agree to the Terms & Conditions.”

Q: Why did the computer show up at work late?
A: It had a hard drive.

A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?” The man below says: “Yes. You’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field.” “You must work in Information Technology,” says the balloonist. “I do” replies the man. “How did you know?” “Well,” says the balloonist, “everything you have told me is technically correct, but It’s of no use to anyone.”
The man below replies, “You must work in management.” “I do,” replies the balloonist, “But how’d you know?” “Well”, says the man, “you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault.”

“Knock, knock. Who’s there?” very long pause… “Java.”